david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
21 People Confess Their Craziest Online Dating Experience
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
She tied me up with her honor cords...
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
These 27 Hilarious People Wrote Their Own Obituaries
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER