sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
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