yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
tell me about the fingering
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