I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
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