I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
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