if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Randomize
