Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
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