I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
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