Have you finally orgasmed yet?
I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
she pinky promised me she was 18
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Randomize
