I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
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