I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
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i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
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I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.