party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
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