I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Randomize