Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
that's an acceptable place to lick
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
