it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
Randomize