dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
Randomize
