I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
Randomize