if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Randomize
