i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
This is classic penis vs brain.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
Randomize
