if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
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