I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
I can't put those talents on a resume
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
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