I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Randomize
