I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
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