I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize
