Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
