is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
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