That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
Randomize
