69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
Randomize
