omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
Randomize
