Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
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