Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
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