had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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