im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
