i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Randomize