She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
You were trust falling into bushes
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
Randomize
