So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
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