I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Randomize
