He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize
