I don't remember. Are we still dating?
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
Randomize
