she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
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