so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
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