if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
Randomize