I want to make a zoo with you.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
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