Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
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