Woke up this morning to a janitor hitting me in the head with his bucket in the hallway of my building. An alumni was next to me because we locked ourselves out of my room and couldn't figure out where my roommates were.
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
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I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
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I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
Please don't give away my fajitas
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