I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
