I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Randomize
