just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
Randomize
