last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
