They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
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