last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
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